Crusin’ in Cali: roadtrip roundup

Hi Everyone!

We’re back from our California road trip and feeling awesome! Here’s a little recap of our amazing trip!

We started off in Hermosa Beach, which is in LA county. It was absolutely GORGEOUS there and I wouldn’t mind staying there for the rest of my life. We went to the beach, walked to nearby beaches and neighborhoods, ate phenomenal healthy food, and went to a stunning wedding!

After 3 nights, we went to get our rental car (just a casual BMW 428i Convertible…no biggie), and headed up through Malibu to Santa Barbara. It was a pretty ride along the coast and Santa Barbara is a cute town. We were only there for a night, so we didn’t do a ton of sight seeing, but certainly a nice place to stay!

Bright and early the next morning we hit the road on the Pacific Coast Highway and drove all the way up to Monterey. It  took about 9 hours total with several stops including the Elephant Seals in San Simeon, dolphins in Big Sur, lunch at Nepanthe, and a few stops along the PCH just to take in the scenery. I seriously recommend everyone take this ride once in their lifetime. It was so beautiful. I even drove on the really scary parts because I figured I’d be less likely to barf if I were behind the wheel (I was right!)

We stayed overnight in Monterey with a trip to the aquarium (which is fabulous) and dinner in Carmel (not Caramel, which was disappointing to this preggo).

Finally, we headed up to San Francisco for the day to hang with my cousin Eve, and my brother, Ben, who then took us up to Napa for our final 3 nights. This was a much less eventful trip than my last visit to Napa (you may remember the 6.1 earthquake last time), but still beautiful and less wine-soaked as I hit 21 weeks pregnant.

Overall, it was so nice to get away and refresh for summer. I am finally starting to feel confident with this new body, and even walked around Hermosa in just a sports bra and shorts, which I’ve never done before in my life! It was nice to eat healthy with a few  a lot of delicious treats (like the Chocolate Bomb I didn’t share at Morimoto, the loaf of bread and butter at Bouchon Bakery, and the endless number of macarons I ate at the wedding). We did a fair amount of walking, but we also did a fair amount of driving. My brother and I went to a yoga class in Napa. which was super nice, and we refueled with pizza. So really, I think this pregnancy is teaching me true balance. I am feeling really great at this point and enjoying where I am.

So now we’re back home, I have zero plans until September and I feel fantastic about sitting on the couch with Gloria, watching terrible TV, dragging my tush to the beach, and doing whatever I damn well please!

Hope you all have a fabulous week!

xoR

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Cancun: An ED Free Vacation

Hello! I have so much to tell you, where do I start?!

Well for starters, Chris and I were in Cancun last week and it was AH-mazing. For those of you that do not follow me on Instagram (you should, by the way), here are some brag-stagrams for your viewing pleasure:

Yes, I am aware that these photos are just the same selfie/beachshot/sunset over and over again, but we literally did nothing besides lay on the beach, drink mojitos, and eat. This vacation was freaking awesome and the number 1 reason it was so good was because ED was NOT invited. Last year over February vacation, Chris and I went to Jamaica. That trip was a real turning point in my recovery as it was the first time I truly felt that I was able to be on vacation without ED. It is so interesting to look at your life in a series of vacations and snapshots and realize how far you’ve come. After re-reading that blog post, I realize that my recovery has continued to evolve to the point where now I don’t even think about ED when planning a trip. Or while ordering sugary drinks. Or eating what looks good. Or while digging through the 50 (that’s correct, 5-0) pounds of clothing I brought to Mexico, only to wear 3 different bikinis and 2 dresses for dinner. THIS is recovery.

This photo is what truly opened my eyes to what a year of recovery looks like:

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The left side is last year in Jamaica. I was SO nervous about having Chris take it. I made him take like 30 or 40 versions with various levels of tummy sucking in and flexing, and hemmed and hawed over posting it. I nit picked every inch of my body after posting my blog and felt really weird about the whole thing. The right side is this year in Cancun. This year, I thought it would be funny to post the same picture. Chris took a couple versions because the sun was behind a cloud. This is not flexed or sucked in. This is a spray tan and a sun burn. That’s a real smile. So while I really felt recovered in Jamaica, I still had some serious body image things going on. Am I completely comfortable in my body 100% of the time? No. But what this photo comparison really shows is that a year of loosening up my diet and exercise plan and being nicer to myself yielded a billion times more confidence, and some visible abs! Hey, I’ll take that over sucking and flexing every day.

Sunday night we got stranded in Florida (which was actually a lot worse than it sounds), and the only open restaurant in a 20 mile radius was a 24 hr diner. Chris and I ate omelets, french toast, onion rings, tater tots, etc etc etc. No, I didn’t feel tip top the next day, but I was also way too exhausted to work out or care about making sure my diet was perfect. It’s all about balance, people.

Anyway–This week is National Eating Disorder Awareness Week. To celebrate, I’m reveling in bikini pics and happy vacation memories. Also, if you’re in the area, I’m speaking at the MEDA hosted panel of recovered speakers. Come by and hear from some really amazing people about their journeys.

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xoR

Our New Addition! (Spoiler Alert: it’s not a baby)

Hello!

Well we have some SUPER exciting news in our house! We adopted a puppy! Her name is Gloria (after Gloria Estefan), she’s a 6-10 month old Border Collie mix and so stinkin’ cute I could just die. I’m already head over heels for her and she doesn’t even come home until Thursday!

unnamed3I’ve been trying to prep Charlie and Oliver for the arrival of their new baby sister, but hopefully they’ll just deal with it like everything else: hide in terror for 3 days, then get over it and resume to normal lazy cat status.

In the meantime, I’ve been making use of our home gym and recently found this EXCELLENT blog filled with suspension training (TRX) workouts! I bought THIS suspension trainer from Amazon, which was way more affordable than the name-brand and quite honestly the exact same thing. We just installed a heavy duty eye hook into a big beam in the basement, linked the suspension trainer up to it and got to work! Yesterday I completed the following workout with a few modifications.

TRXFIT 2.5 modified from Puretrxtraining.wordpress.com

Each exercise is completed for 45 seconds with 15 seconds of rest between. Complete each circuit 2x. Single limb exercises should be completed on one side for one circuit and the other for the second circuit. At the very end, complete all exercises for 30s with 10s rest from beginning to end. ST=Suspension Trainer

Circuit 1 – Repeat 2x

  • ST Chest Press
  • Push Ups
  • ST Row
  • Single Arm Kettlebell Row
  • ST Crunch
  • Plank

Circuit 2 – Repeat 2x

  • ST Single Leg Squat
  • Body Weight Squat
  • ST Hamstring Curl
  • Dumbbell Single Arm Tricep Kickbacks
  • ST Tricep Press
  • Kettlebell Swing

Circuit 3 – Repeat 2x

  • ST Y Raise
  • Dumbbell Shoulder Press
  • Dumbbell Lateral Raise
  • ST Bicep Curls
  • Dumbbell Bicep Curls

trx_web-16For more suspension fun, check out THIS old blog post and THIS huffblog post! Enjoy! Have a great week 🙂

xoR

You Can’t Sit With Us: a weekend in Miami recap

Hello! It’s Monday. I’m tired. And hungover. And have no voice. Must have had the best time EVER in Miami!

Woo! What a weekend! It was filled with champagne, bikinis, sunshine, club nights and tiny dresses. Pretty much a recipe for success! I have to say, I was pretty nervous and self conscious going in, but I honestly had such a blast and I know the bride did too!

It was interesting being in a large group of beautiful girls and really listening to what they each had to say. Body consciousness came up sort of a lot this weekend in both a direct and indirect way (which I guess isn’t surprising since we were all either wearing bathing suits or skin tight dresses). Several of the girls that I found myself comparing to were making negative comments about their own bodies. Normally that’s not a huge deal, and actually expected in a way. Our society has instructed us to be this way and that it’s ok. Well, it’s not, and we need to find something positive about ourselves every day and stop comparing. It’s certainly not easy, but let’s give it a try! I’m ready!

Here are some pics from the best weekend everrrr!

I saw a really interesting TED talk the day before I left for Miami covering the topic of body image and it had some pretty staggering stats. It’s really worth the 16 minutes.

You can learn more about Jes Baker here

I’m feeling empowered today (can you tell??) and really ready to leave this negative body image behind. When I look at the above photos of myself I need to make a decision. I can either overanalyze and feel bad about my body, or remember the kick ass time we had celebrating together! I think I’ll go with the latter.

Have a fab day and make sure to say something nice about yourself before days end (it can be harder than you think!).

xoR

Newport, New Mindset: mini vacay thoughts

Hello!

Sorry I’ve been MIA! Chris and I were on a mini-vacay last week in Newport, RI! Holy gorgeous! It was the perfect little getaway to relax, get some sunshine, see friends, and refocus on what’s important.

Before last week, I was definitely struggling with old ED thoughts. As hard as I pushed back, I could feel myself sliding into old ways. It’s actually the worst feeling in the world. Newport came at just the right time to get me out of my head, and onto the beach!

I took time to notice how my emotions play into body image. I was feeling really bloated and sorry for myself when we first got to Newport…then I received some really good news about some jobs, and suddenly I was feeling confident in my body and appearance! WTF?! I’m pretty sure I didn’t gain and lose some monstrous amount of weight in the span of 1 phone call…so it’s interesting to take inventory on body image as it responds to emotions and try to separate the two. Just because I’m having a bad day, doesn’t mean I’m fat. Confidence has to come from beyond that. I decided to keep a bit of a photo journal for the rest of the summer of me wearing summertime clothes, having a good time, nothing thinking about my size. I started with this pic:

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Is that body perfect? Nope. But it’s my body, and that’s pretty damn awesome.

Anyway, this plan might sound conceited, but it really helps me keep perspective. PS: those aren’t my boogie boards.

I know you’re dying to see more pictures, so here ya go!

And in case you’re wondering, I bought my sneakers to Newport, but they stayed in my suitcase. We did a fair amount of walking, but mostly I just didn’t care to workout. Now that we’re back, I’m trying to stay with that vacation mindset (I am still on vacation, afterall!). I’m nourishing my body and exercising in a reasonable and fun way. My body does a lot for me, I need to be nice to it!

That’s it for me. Have a fab week!

xoR

Loving Life in Jamaica: a revelation

Hello! We’re back from Jamaica! What a whirlwind of a week, but I’m feeling rested, relaxed and ready to rock.

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Jamaica was unbelievably beautiful and we had a fab time. I’ve mentioned before that historically vacations were difficult for me in terms of recovery. I often felt out of control because I was less able to micro-manage my food and exercise, which left me with debilitating guilt and shame. My black and white, all or nothing attitude made traveling incredibly hard.

I can remember making deals with myself before a vacation. For example, before our honeymoon to Costa Rica, I promised myself I was not going to count calories. By the second day, I was so terrified of my potential imperfection that I paid extra wifi fees just to get online to track my intake for the rest of the trip. Not exactly what I had envisioned.

This vacation was different. Sure, the resort could have used a fresh coat of paint, and was infested with drunk Canadians (literally), but I found myself being more comfortable in my skin than ever before. As someone suffering from body consciousness, wearing a bikini all day every day can be a daunting task. However, on this trip I wore my bikini all day every day without even a second thought. I can honestly say that I feel pride in my body. It’s not perfect…but it’s my body! It’s the one that I need to take care of, so I better be nice to it!

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In addition, the resort was an all inclusive, which meant most meals came in the form of a buffet. If you ever want to make someone with an eating disorder squirm (which I don’t recommend, btw), take her to a buffet. I used to feel sheer terror when it came to eating on vacation…then throw a buffet in the mix, where there is unlimited food with unknown nutrition stats…nightmare. However, this was different. Sure, I tried to stick to basics like grilled fish, veggies, and fruit, but there were also yummy treats like fried plantains, sweet biscuits, and bacon. Oh and frozen cocktails. Lots of frozen cocktails. No, I didn’t just go balls to the wall and eating crap all day every day, but I did eat and drink what I really wanted and felt no guilt.

All in all, I’m feeling refreshed and reminded of why recovery is so awesome. Without recovery, this vacation would have just been another sad memory of “what if?” Instead, this vacation will be a fantastic memory of fun times with my husband, loving my body, and…frozen cocktails.

Just in case I haven’t bombarded you all enough with all this ED recovery stuff (it is Eating Disorder Awareness Week, afterall!), I spotted this magazine faux pas in the airport:

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Notice any glaring differences between the men’s and women’s version of the SAME magazine??? Why do boys get to gain weight and girls have to lose?! I challenge each and every one of you to find a women’s magazine that does not mention “get skinny”, “lose weight”, “get sexy” or something of the like on the cover. #NOTBUYINGIT.

That’s it for me!

xo R